Beginnings

When I was about 17 years old, I went on a backpacking trip with Colorado Outward Bound. The experience was life-altering for me. After the trip was over, I felt alive, free and totally confident. Some of that has never left me. The experience functioned as a kind of initiation, I think. But the feelings didn't last forever.

Initiations are an experience of transformation and reintegration into society with a new identity. In my case at that time, before the experience, I felt restricted and constricted by something. I thought it was social mores at that time, but now I realize there is more than one way to percieve reality. After the Outward Bound experience, I felt unlimited and powerful. Sometimes when I hear people talk about "enlightenment", I feel that was a kind of "enlightenment" for me.

After high school, I joined the Marines, because I felt I needed to push my limits. After about a year I picked up a book with the subtitle, "mind power". I knew that if I was going to be competetive, I needed that book. And I felt, if there was one thing I could excel in, it would be "mind power". One of the suggestions was to act as if you already have what you want. And one of the things I wanted was to be a leader. So when I thought about what I needed to do to act as if I was a leader, I realized that I wasn't always doing the things a leader does. In fact, some of the time I was actively misbehaving in small ways as a kind of subversive rebellion. Suddenly I realized I was the cause of my own misfortune. I couldn't blame it on anyone else. And I could overcome all problems I had caused for myself by simply acting as if. Military leadership books and manuals also say the same thing: to lead by example, or to set the example, is the most powerful of all leadership traits.

Outward Bound and USMC boot camp both function as a kind of initiation. They are designed as such. So let's look at the way they are designed. Each has a three-part structure. In the beginning, you are dependent. In boot camp, they shave your hair and take away all your belongings. Anything that can give you a sense of identity. In outward bound they teach you how to navigate in the mountains, how to cook, and how to choose and set up camp. In boot camp they teach you how to walk and talk, and keep everything neat and tidy including your body, your bed and your weapon. In the second phase, there is a kind of guided independence. In boot camp, you are expected to do certain things without being told. In outward bound, the students lead for the day and the instructors follow at a safe but out of sight distance. And finally, in the third phase, you are treated as a new person. You pass some tests and you get a new identity. These initiation experiences mimic the natural psychological development of a human from dependent baby to semi-independent child and independent young adult.

I emerged from Outward Bound feeling that I could accomplish anything. Yet I still faced some inner limitations which stopped me from fully experiencing some of life. So I continued to explore the world of accessing my human potential. I'm still trying today to create flow in my life.

Along the way I've learned a few things about how the mind and body work, and some ideas that are practical for living a good life, and for moving into the flow.

Flow

Life flows forward, like a river flows, like a pathway that never ends. Flow is a state of enjoyment; and to enjoy life requires us to enter into the flow of life.